random

this post has nothing to do about nothing, maybe. I'll just let my fingers type whatever I'm thinking. It may not make much sense, but hopefully I can make something out of nothing...

I just watched the movie 'Bride Wars' and something stood out to me.

"Sometimes in life there really are bonds formed that can never be broken. Sometimes you really can find that one person who will stand by you no matter what. Maybe you will find it in a spouse and celebrate it with your dream wedding. But there's also the chance that the one person you can count on for a lifetime, the one person who knows you sometimes better than you know yourself is the same person who's been standing beside you all along."

It made me realize that in my own life, I have no one that will stand by me no matter what. Nobody that knows me better than I know myself, nobody who has been standing beside me all along.

Maybe it's because I don't allow anybody to get that close. My defenses are always up and I don't know the reason for that. It's such a hindrance to meet new people because I always think they want something for me. I need to find out what's the underlying cause for that because that shit has GOT to stop.